Deep, Deep, Deep, Deep Confusion and Frustration

i am in deep deep deep deep confusion and frustration about life. my life to be exact. and i don't know how to solve them problems that have been stuck in my mind the last few days. i feel like my life is a competition with other people. its like i am not good enough to do anything. i will not be chosen based on how i act, think etc. its the bad qualities that are looked at. i also feel that i am looked at differently then others around me and that the people i think are my friends show me they are not friends to me. just people that i talk to. they show no emotion towards me. i am just an OUTSIDER and am not included. why does this always happen to ME and not anyone else. am i really not good enough or is it that i am not a person people are able to connect to right away. i don't like being ignored or left out. i wish they would make me feel apart of their group but they chose to look past that and they don't realize the consequences that i may feel. hopefully this will turn around but everyday it becomes clearer that this is the way it will alwayds be...... until i graduate.....